Don’t Be Rushed

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Knowing, trusting, and becoming content in God does not happen overnight or in the early years of our decisions to walk closely with Him. We have been through years of torment, pain, struggles, disappointments, trauma, etc. Things won’t be ‘roses and chirpy birds’ instantly. It will take time to heal, for minds and hearts to be changed, and for our spirits/ souls to find rest.

Don’t compare yourself to others due to where you are in your walk. Don’t feel less of a believer because your faith does not look like another’s.

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Everyone’s path is different. You are in your own unique and beautiful lane, stay there and grow there. (Notice I say beautiful… I believe the most amazing thing in life is knowing God! Whether we have difficult periods, challenging or smooth ones, I call them all beautiful because he is there with us). God is fully aware and focused on you and will not miss a day in attending to you. Even if you have been walking with him for a long time. Look at where you are right now but be ecstatic about where he will take you over time. One of the beauties of a relationship with God is that sometimes we never know what to expect or what might happen next. And though sometimes this can be scary, it can also be mindblowing because HE IS GOOD! He does not think the way we do. We could be thinking we aren’t enough or doing enough and yet he sees us as his most precious creation and being right where he needs us to be. God is always working in, on, and through us, in the simplest ways we may overlook.

Don’t sweat where you are, love, and enjoy your slow process. God is the one leading us and taking us where we need to be and he will put a knowing in our spirits when the time is right. We only need to listen within.

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I’ve experienced burnout out so many times because I thought for God. That maybe he wants me to do this or that and when things flopped I felt disappointed and drained or wondered if I misheard him. But, I believe God wants constant communication, dependency on him, faith and trust in him, and here’s the big one… patience. Patience with him and especially with ourselves. I honestly have to constantly remind myself of this. Even if and when we mess up, I believe he simply wants these. Don’t allow others or your own mind to rush your growth. God was the one who called you to himself, he needed no help. Allow him to navigate your relationship with him, love.

Phil 2:13 “For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.”

Zech 4:1 “… not by might nor by power but by my spirit, says the Lord Almighty…”

Restoration’s Hope

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A huge portion of last year for me was bittersweet. I had begun some inner work/ healing a few years prior and was excited about getting an apartment and having much-needed time for myself. My plan was to spend the year unlearning all I had known and for God to teach me all I needed to know. To understand me a bit more and make adjustments where needed in solitude. Of course, it takes more than a year to unlearn and learn what God wants 🙂 but being alone with him, I anticipated with deep joy.
Things started out great! From me asking Him what color furniture to get and Him leading me to my amazing apartment (i called my mini penthouse.)
But this deep joy, came with me also feeling hopeless, extremely disappointed, and discouraged, and if I am being honest, I came close to ‘throwing in the towel’ a few times. I was deeply angry with God and I told him.

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See, I had been crying out to God for 7 years about something specific, waiting on him to act. It’s funny how waiting can sometimes make one forget the countless things God did in the past. How did my plan to draw closer to God turned into
nights of soaking my pillow with tears, not the tears of joy I had hoped for. As weeks turned to months, I began praying and reading lesser and lesser. “Where are you? How can you just stand there watching me suffer the same way for years?
You promised no more empty seasons yet it’s been 3 years since and nothing changed. Love, I grew exhausted and needed to be revived by Him. I needed to be reminded that I wasn’t forgotten. I needed guidance because the beautiful path I had embarked on was now cloudy and dark.

I repeated “I will never leave you nor forsake you” many times but these words no longer comforted my parched soul.
I needed to see God’s hand. I needed him to come to my rescue. I needed an answer.
In August things took a turn and finally, I was seeing little light at the end of the tunnel, I just was not yet at the end.
But it opened a small window of hope. Shortly after, trouble struck again.
At this point, I felt as if someone had taken me high in the air and then dropped me at high speed. I became completely silent, I was not in the mood to talk to/ with God, I needed a break and so I took one.

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5 1/2 years earlier He had spoken “JOB, JOB, the book of JOB” in my spirit. On and off I tried to understand what personally he wanted me to know, and the thought came back I read from the beginning once more. I got to chapter 4:3-6 and
every word cut like a knife as my eyes ran over them. My anger ceased, my heart became full and tears came flooding.
God spoke and nothing has and will ever feel as comforting as hearing from him. He instantly revived the promises he had made to me and reassured me of his ever-present presence. He restored strength.
This came with deep peace and deeper trust. I became extremely confident and was willing to get back in position, to wait and enjoy a future he gave me a glimpse of and promises yet to be fulfilled. My hope was restored and joy overwhelmed me. Tears of joy became the majority that soaked my pillows each morning as I woke up where I used to cry myself to sleep at night being overwhelmed by emotional pain.

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Love, at our weakest points, it’s so easy to become blind and feel as if we are alone.
However, God is there with us through EVERY sea of emotions, EVERY road of difficulties, EVERY disappointment even when pain tries to blind us, he truly is there. A promise is a promise and Joshua 1:5 is profoundly comforting, even when we feel otherwise.
Keep talking to him about how you feel, while you are feeling it…I’m my best when I go to him from exactly where I am.
He is bigger than my emotions, even through silence. He was there holding me.
Last year was needed, all the emotions I felt were on purpose, I believe, because they got me closer to God as I hoped but just a different route.

Job 4:3-6 “In the past, you have encouraged many people; you have strengthened those who were weak. 4) Your words have supported those who were falling; you encouraged those with shaky knees. 5) But now when trouble strikes you lose heart. You are terrified when it touches you. 6) Doesn’t your reverence for God give you confidence? Doesn’t your life of integrity give you hope?”

Joshua 1:5 “…I will not fail you or abandon you.”

Nature’s Healing

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For some, nature can be a very inviting place. It helps to revive the mind, body, and spirit. Feeling Down? Irritated? Stressed? Try stepping outside for about 15 minutes even if it’s just to sit on your balcony/ patio. It helps to clear the mind of our everyday thoughts, worries, and routines.

Nature also helps to put us in a better mood… It slows time down and allows us to live in the present moment if we let it. Inhaling the fresh air, listening to birds chirping or other animals scurrying in nearby bushes. beautiful winged butterflies visiting to enjoy the weather with us. Devices away and a sit on a bench in a nice quiet area gives us the space to connect with our inner selves and tackle any area that’s been nudging at us whether through prayer or making a decision on that thing we’ve been thinking about for the past… every day. Plus great way to get some steps in! Exercise :D! Peaceful and safe communication happens when our critical voice isn’t so loud anymore.

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Being at a park in a city with my stepdad on some Sunday afternoons adds peace. While he is riding I enjoy walking 1 or 2 laps before being drawn by the lake, the different types of flowers, such beauty :)! Or by this track that leads to a little secluded area where it’s half shaded and half sunned-your choice! I sometimes sit here and relax, breathing deeply with my eyes closed, listening to the birds, or clearing my mind. Having a cluttered mind is very much like having a cluttered/ messy space. For some, it makes it challenging to focus or rest unless our space is tidy.

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Next time you are feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, stressed, or down… Take a walk outside and enjoy God’s beautiful creation while it revives your body, mind, and spirit. 🙂

Beauty…

Seeing the beauty and good in life is IN the eyes of the beholder…

We complain at times about “bad weathers” first, there are no bad weather love, let’s take a minute to remind ourselves of this. All-weather does its job, the very thing it was created to do. “Lightning and hail, snow and cold, stormy winds that do his bidding..” -Psalm 148:8

We can still trust that God will take us safely through challenging situations. If he allows or causes things to happen, he has a way out, always! Let’s take snowy roads, for example, sometimes dangerous with ice underneath and causes accidents. We just have to trust that God will be the driver to take us to our destinations safely and alive.

When we complain, love, we miss the beauty, the good in our situations, our surroundings, our inner lives… I, for one love the different seasons here. I am not a fan of the cold lol, but I do appreciate it. See, I’m from the islands where it’s sunny all year round and rainy few months. The fall, I love the changing leaves and watching them fall into heaps. The bright colors burnt orange, yellows, reds. Spring, everything comes to life again. Beautiful purple and pink flowers, bright fresh green fields. It’s lovely. Summer, the warm sun, and opportunities for summer outfits creation. Fireworks… Winter, fluffy snowflakes, snow angels, chocolate tea, yes, please! Naked trees covered with snow, Christmas lights and decorations. All these are beauties we already enjoy. Yes sometimes we get challenging weather but maybe it’s only to slow us down, not to stop us.

God will always be with us, no matter where life takes us we can always choose to see the beauty in life. It will be okay.

Uncertain Times…? Troubled Relationships…?

Love, we face intense times where uncertainty, separation, and goodbyes are becoming sudden naturally, forced, or Relationships are either being profoundly challenged or ending. The easiest thing to do is walk away. The thought of starting over with someone new after more than 7 years together (even less) can be exciting, at the same time, hard for some.
But can I also remind you that the hard road, reconciliation, staying, and fighting can also be a beautiful experience?

Broken or troubled marriages/ relationships aren’t a surprise to God!! Only to us. And there’s no relationship under the sun that can’t be repaired no matter how far gone the relationship is. The only ones who can completely dissolve a marriage are YOU/ US. In the same line, the only ones who can nurture that same relationship back to health are YOU/ US.!
Yes, the romance might be gone. The love might be gone or has weakened. Maybe too many arguments, unpleasant ways, changes. Maybe there’s infidelity… Add to the list. Perhaps you’ve changed, perhaps they’ve changed.
But despite all that going on around us (earth being under heavy mourning), don’t forget that God is the healer, restorer, giver, and breather of life.

Love has died, I got you- “For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the DRY wasteland.- Isaiah 43:19

Too much has changed, and you can’t see how things can be great again? Hold up- “But when it (whatever your IT- problems are) is uprooted,
it’s as though it never existed!
That’s the end of its life,
and others spring up from the earth to replace it. Job 8:18
“Again, you will plant vineyards on the hills of Samaria; the farmers will plant them and enjoy their fruit.”
‭‭Jeremiah‬ ‭31:5‬ ‭NIV

Maybe remembering the amazing times you shared together and how much in love you were. How you make each other laugh and how much you both have invested in together over the years won’t jog your memory enough to spark ‬‬something in you, or maybe it will? Things change, sometimes for better, some times not so pleasing but it’s apart of what makes us amazing beings, but let’s not forget we aren’t alone. God is with us.

Maybe you’re just tired, and that’s okay.

God can refresh your love for each other. He can reconcile any marriages, relationships, friendship… Yes, it might take time but he can turn things around to what you never thought was possible even if you’ve known this person for 10 years and have gotten used to them.
Don’t throw love away. Don’t give up on love, not while God is the God we say and know him to be. Don’t shut him in a box, expand that box! Let God take you and your lover to a new place 💖. Let’s stay together love, enough separation is already naturally happening. Press through if your inner voice/ heart tells you to.

Rom 12:12 Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying.

Stay #Experience #Testimony #LetGoLetGod #HeIsFightingWithAndForYOUS #PRAY

Don’t Give Up On What You’ve Asked God For

Love, when you depend on God, when you’re trusting him, waiting on him, bad breaks will come, disappointments may come, discouragement, delay… you name it.
But it doesn’t mean He is asleep on you or forgot about you. God WILL deliver what you’ve asked for or what he’s promised.

When you get tired, rest! Ask him for strength to keep standing and waiting and praying.

Ninety-nine percent of the time, it’s us who walk away or give up; He never stops working. God can never fail!
It might take time, but ooh, when that time is complete & the gift finally arrives, it’s always worth it!
Don’t give up during the bad breaks or delays; cry out to him or take a minute for yourself but don’t give up on Him. 😌

Do your best to stay hopeful and joyful as much as you can. Whenever you feel hopeless and discouraged, ask Him to meet you where you’re at and restore your hope. I promise you He will; He’s got you!

Hab 2:3 “This vision is for a future time. It describes the end, and it will be fulfilled. If it seems slow in coming, wait patiently, for it will surely take place. It will not be delayed.”
‭‭Habakkuk‬ ‭2:3‬ ‭NLT‬‬

“Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying.”
‭‭Romans‬ ‭12:12‬ ‭NLT‬‬

#Testimony

Watch What You Allow To Permeate Your Mind.

Psst, be careful of outside thoughts trying to break into your mind and later breaks your spirit. This will steal your joy and slowly put out your light. YOU ARE LIGHT! Protect your energy!
Protect your gates, love!

Don’t give way to every thought that comes to mind.

  1. Does it uplift you? Does it encourages leads you to make healthy adjustments and changes? Does it inspire you to grow, create, show love? Does it make your deepest inner (soul) smile?
  2. Does it make you feel worthless, forgotten, empty, low, drained, depressed, condemned?

There’s always a choice to make.

My peace, comforter, strength, and favorite listener have been God the whole time. I mainly share my experience and testimonies here. I’ve vented, cried, prayed, and rested on God’s knees, and he’s helped and still is helping me.

You are and will never be forgotten. You are worth EVERYTHING in God’s sight! You are valuable, but you have to believe and accept this about yourself first. Joy is our core, it’s who we are, but we have to face fight thoughts that burdens us a soul. You have to make this choice to take back control and draw the line, set the boundaries. We have God on our side!

The mind is like a garden, what do you intend to plant in yours? 🌼🌺🌸🌻🌷🌹🌾🪴🎍

We won’t always have positive, uplifting thoughts it’s just the choice we make during these times and the patience we have and need.
And if you make a wrong one, or wrong ones, be patient with yourself. We are all growing and trying to do the best we can at the moment.

Doubting God?

We can’t allow doubt in while learning to trust God. God and doubt doesn’t and cannot go hand in hand, one will be forced to be eliminated.

We can’t always trust what we ‘feel’, sometimes our emotions aren’t the safest, depending on where we are spiritually/ mentally.

In that same token, it’s important to learn to trust our inner voice/ intuition/ discernment even if and when we don’t understand it! That’s where God mostly speaks to us. Get quiet and listen. We hear all the time to trust our ‘gut feeling/ intuition,’ but how do we know the difference between us speaking or God? The best way I can explain it is found in Heb 4:12 “For the word of God is alive and powerful. It is sharper than the sharpest two-edged sword, cutting between soul and spirit, between joint and marrow. It exposes our innermost thoughts and desires.” You hear it loud and clear, deep on the inside. It comes with peace, power, love and authority. It’s a gentle and calming voice.

The holy spirit lives within us, therefore we have to be open to listening inward, not only what we hear outward and from others. Bonus, you will experience peace, his amazing peace here.

If God says something, it surely will be done! It will come to pass. There might be some waiting, some longgggg waiting but whenever we get tired, feel forgotten, or discouraged along the way, we can ask for new strength and comfort, and he will grant these and more.

Go on that uncertain journey, keep walking when the storm comes- and it will come- but standstill, “be still and know that I am God.”- psalm 46: 10

What has God promised you? How long ago was it? Be reminded today love, that his word will not return to him without doing. Keep standing, waiting, cry if you need to dry your eyes, and slip back into your confident outfit.

Pray with me, love:

Lord, before I met you, doubt interfered with my life ALOT! I don’t mean to doubt anything you do because I believe wholeheartedly that you are the only Almighty God, you are the creator, you are alpha and omega, and there’s nothing you cannot do!

My experiences in life, however, caused my trust to be shattered, and even as I’m walking with you, they still affect me from time to time. But, your word said, “not by might nor by power but by my spirit, ” (Zechariah 4:6) so lord, I’m asking you to help me. Permeate all of me with all of you and let me learn consistently and steadfastly to think the way you do and grow in knowledge and understanding that I may grow in being more like you. I desire what you see and hope for me.

Work on me, Lord, none stop; I thank you so much for this! For being in my life and by my side. Help me to work on doubting, especially when I’m having faith in you, when I’m hoping for something, and learning to trust you.

I believe in you with every atom of my being. Increase my patience, father, as I continue on this ‘sometimes uncertain’ road. Let me not rush or become discouraged when I bump into something or get distracted. Or when I meet storms or rough seasons along the way.

Thank you for your protection and guidance even when it seems I’m alone, and you’re not with me; help me once again to remember that “you will never leave me, nor forsake me” (Deuteronomy 31:8) in Jesus’ name. Amen.

Mental Health Struggles.

Can we who are on the outside looking in, try not to tell someone in distress to “calm down, relax, stop crying, don’t cry, be strong, stop playing the victim, it could be worse, it’s not that serious, other people have been through worst or are going through worst, or to look on the bright side.”

Instead of giving coping advice, can we be strong for them since they are in a weak state? Can we pray for them since ‘right now’ they seem hopeless? Can we comfort them instead of constantly trying to fix things? Be our brothers/ sisters keepers…

Everyone handles situations differently! This is true! We aren’t all the same. What affects me deeply may be water under the bridge for someone else and vice versa. .

No one knows precisely how a person feels or what thoughts they battle during distress.
Being there, really being there for someone, means to listen or ask how we can help.

How would you want someone to respond or deal with you when going through difficult times? 😊

Prayer Heals… God Heals…

I suffered depression for over five years, cried myself to sleep many nights, felt sad, tired, and defeated most of the time. Some days it was so hard to get out of bed, go to work or just show up/ exist for the day. Not many understood my pain or would understand even if I explained as not everyone is open to the fact that mental illness is a thing. Also, you have to experience it to truly know what it’s like.

Introverts, as some of you know, enjoy being by themselves. It’s not that we don’t like the company of others. But during this time, I didn’t want to be around anyone- at all!
I even contemplated suicide.
Excitement wasn’t a thing or a word in my vocabulary! It’s almost like a heavy dark cloud followed me around all the time. My body/ shoulders were always tensed, and I viewed most of my emotions in a harmful and unhealthy way, even when they were healthy and okay as a being.

I struggled to find joy and peace. As a lover of nature, being outside helped me but to a small extent and a small amount of time.

I remember crying out to God many times, after forming a relationship with him- that he helped me created- that I was unhappy, drained, heavy, and exhausted 99 percent of the time. I wanted control of my mind back. I needed inner peace, joy, calm, etc. I was tired of being depressed and wanting to give up.
While I was encouraging everyone else through writing (and my blog), praying for, and with everyone else, I was secretly drowning in tears and pain. Still, I depended on him to rescue me even when it seemed nothing was happening. 😢

Last year (as I did the year before) I asked Him for a mindblowing birthday gift (yes, I’m particular and open with him and what I desire, he’s literally the best friend and spiritual father I could ever ask for). It was the week of my birthday; while talking with someone about struggles, with anxiety and depression, I noticed that something was different. I no longer resonated with “depression” it was as if it no longer existed in my life.
I realized then that I had been entirely healed of depression!!! You can imagine my emotion… I cried so hard sitting in the parking lot of my sister’s empty car. I was overwhelmed with many different emotions; shocked, joyful, surprised, and in awe.

My hope, joy, and peace were restored.
Inner healing in other areas had begun.

God is so faithful and wants to help us more than we can imagine and understand.
I called on him when I was in a challenging place. He heard and answered me. Today, though I still struggle with anxiety, I don’t worry because that too shall pass.

Whatever your struggles are, God can and will help you. Cry if you have to, vent when you feel like but don’t dismiss your emotions. They are apart of you! He will come to your rescue. It may take a while but don’t give up. Invite him in your present situations. He initiates a relationship with us, we need only to be open and receptive.
Prayer changes things!

Don’t be ashamed about your struggles love, it might be what someone else is waiting to hear, and know that they aren’t alone.