REST! Stop Beating Yourself Up So Much!

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We have personally experienced so much of the prodigal son’s story on our journey. Upon realizing, we beat ourselves down without realizing the grace and love that Jesus used to return us back to his arms and a state of mental peace without actually condemning us.
It’s really us overwhelm ourselves with unkind thoughts and words instead of being gentle and patient with ourselves enough to see that we can just run back to Jesus and surrender control to him every singe time we mess up, seventy times seven, and not be in the trouble we think we are in.

I’m currently in a position where I’m depending on God to change a specific situation for me. At times, I allow anxiety and fear brings me to a place where I take control without realizing or intentionally try to take control. At times, I get curious. Should my curiosity lead me to a roadblock or detour, I find that I sometimes worry instead of running to my savior without feeling like I’m in trouble and get hard on myself.

I am learning to be okay with my curiosity because wherever it takes me, God is there as well. Ever since I became open to this thought, it’s been even more wonderful! 

If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there. – Psalm 139:8

Photo by Kourosh Qaffari on

This morning while drinking a bowl of cereal, I’m reminded that I can go to him anytime, whether in the middle, beginning, or end of any situation, and give him total control without beating myself up for waiting too long or fear that he is angry with me because just like the prodigal son’s father, he will welcome me back with open arms and crazy love! Gosh, he loves us so very much!
You see, in the recent past, I would go to him and repent but not without feeling bad- not in a convicted sense- but more of a ”girl, what is wrong with you, why you keep messing up?” and not before isolating myself due to fear that God was angry with me or that he will be. But this only kept me away from him, away from talking with him, away from peace.

He really is a God of love and the more we see him as that and less of a God of wrath we will experience a deeper love and closeness toward him.

My desire is to remind you that you too can run to him no matter how deep you are in your own stuff, without feeling ashamed or condemned. Romans 8:1 reminds us that there are now no condemnation for those who belong to Christ, so throw off whatever is holding you back and might be causing you to isolate and run to our loving God let him wash you in his peace and remove whatever burdens you.

Published by Stephanie

Hello, my name is Stephanie! It is my desire for souls to know Jesus personally; To be freed, uplifted, affirmed, and healed through our Savior. Know that you are loved so much! You have so much worth! You ’belong’ even if the world rejects and sees you as nothing! Despite what people around you, or even what your thoughts say about who you are, Jesus's truth is all that matters, and you are precious to him! Here is a bit of my story! I've been oppressed and ’held captive’ in my own mind for many years! I've struggled with depression for over 10 years. I had low self-esteem, not knowing my own worth. I chased after love, affirmation, attention, and a need to feel wanted- in relationships, to finding fulfillment in things. I didn't know how to love myself or how to receive love! I was sad most of the time to the point where I contemplated suicide twice. Deep inside, I felt a little girl full of joy, harmony, and peace who wanted freedom, and to live a fulfilled life; she was trapped inside. In late 2014 Jesus literally called out to me... and told me I would be okay. I committed my life to him in 2016. Since then, so much has happened! I've been finding shelter under his wings, and my mind is continually being renewed by his truth spoken to and about me. I have found and is still amazed by his perfect, unconditional love for me that follows me daily. I have found a secured relationship that attends to every area of my life. My journey started out rough, but it is BEAUTIFUL! It gets rocky and uncomfortable at times, but it is one filled with lessons, wonder, and crazy peace! It's apart of our walk. I am still healing (I view it as a life long process) some days I take a step forward only to take two backward but I now know to not depend on my strength even during healing as I am never alone. There are also many that I am unlearning and detoxing from my spirit that I grew up learning about. I have opened myself to allowing God to use me as I am, as an outlet to reach his precious ones. The purpose of my blog is to encourage a sincere and intentional relationship with Jesus! To help strengthen our faith and walk in him. To heal, uplift, and remind women of who God says we are. To walk in his identity- in hopes that you will know without a doubt that you matter much more than you can understand! I openly share my testimonies and personal experiences. I mean, it's a bit easier to speak and share from experiences. I firmly believe you will be blessed! Find yourself, find your path, and embark on this beautiful journey of life resting in God. Love, it's perfectly okay to be authentic- about where you are in every area of your life- in a world that forces us to mask our emotions and ’put the best forward, so people can ”see and think” we’ve got it all together.’ It's okay to NOT have it all together. Be true to yourself; this is an important step in being completely honest with our Lord.

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